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Saturday, October 1, 2022

Relationship choices and decision making: Seeking a Fulfilling love Relationship

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Kindly note our feature article on … has defined relationship and love at this early stage to enable our readers understand these and other concepts associated with human relations.

Dear Doc,

I am a 29-year-old man. I have a girlfriend and we have been engaged for two years. To be honest, I have my doubts about her. This is because I feel she is not ‘wife material’. I honestly do not want to marry her for a number of reasons. For instance, she is either buying clothes, having fun or— if we are not out drinking—out on holiday. She never discusses us, family or children. Neither has she ever suggested that we go to her home or mine. Any meeting with her relatives or mine happens only by accident and of course it is casual. She likes us to go out and meet friends and sort of ‘enjoy’ ourselves. I have carefully evaluated the relationship and I strongly feel convinced it is not worthwhile. Please advise.

Dear Doc,

I am a 28-year-old lady with a boyfriend. He is 31 years. We have been together for three years. We are not married and neither has he ever suggested marriage. I have kept insisting that we visit our home and his but to say the truth he has neither the interest in the visits nor the commitment. He likes me to be just there; we are neither engaged nor are we married. We are just friends. He says he loves me but has nothing to show for it. We go out because he insists but for me, I don’t want to go out. I want to be married and settle down with a family. He has never mentioned family. Whenever I ask if he has another friend, he insists that I am the only one. I am now feeling wasted since I can’t just sit here and do nothing as time passes by.

Kindly advise me on this urgent matter.

Dear Doc,

I am a 29-year-old lady and pregnant. My problem is, I am engaged to a man but he has no sense of responsibility. Our relationship is simply jumbled up because he provides no direction. In my wisdom, I thought of becoming pregnant to pump some sense but to my utter surprise, he seems more confused than before! Now kindly explain to me what kind of situation I am in.

Dear Doc,

I am a 42-year-old man and married. We have been together with my wife for 16 years. We were engaged for 3 years and now married for 13 years with three children. I feel my wife does not love me at all, in fact she says she married me because she got pregnant. It is true I married her after she got pregnant with our first child but I later came to love her a lot and I am now committed to our marriage. She says our marriage is over but I do not agree and I am convinced we should go on because of the children. Everyone knows we are married, anyway. I strongly feel my wife is the problem in our marriage. I was talking to my friend who is your student about my wife and she told me that you told them in class it is possible that both partners have a problem. Now I’m confused because according to me, she is the problem. Tell me who has a problem.

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Dr. Geoffrey Wangohttps://counsel-lingmagazine.co.ke/
Many people often ask me about my personal stand, my passion in life and how I got into Counselling Psychology and why in particular the establishment and writing in their favourite publication, The Counsel-ling Magazine. Colleagues and students, participants in various seminars and others suggested that I should include some information that would assist clients, practitioners and students to perhaps establish a career, or even assess and evaluate their ethical, moral and professional standards. Well, this allows for personal reflection and I feel it wise to include a few remarks about my fervour on counselling, mentoring and education as well as various aspects of life.
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